353/444 Healing from Infidelity: Recreational Intimacy, Be Serious about Being Less Serious
2012.08.24
Be serious about setting aside time to be less serious. If you don't leave blocks of time in your life marked for play it most likely won't happen.
Part of our blowout stemmed from being too busy. I was working 11 hours a day, plus picking up an extra shift on weekends here and there plus army reserves one weekend a month. Ann was working full time, getting the kids to where they needed to go in the morning, and getting them here and there after work, and leading the brownie troop. Plus we led a Sunday class for kids and then for jr. high.
Not having free fringe time is a sickness in our society today. The thinking of our business efficiency experts, trying to squeeze every oodle of productivity for workers, has crept into our personal lives with disastrous results.
The best companies are realizing employees need play at work when appropriate or maybe even slightly inappropriate. I attended a leadership summit a couple weeks ago. A couple of the business experts praised Southwest Airlines. In addition to keeping fares low, another of their primary values is to have fun. Perhaps you've been on one of their flights recently and enjoyed the mirth of their flight attendants. I remember it caught me off guard the first time they were joking around. How much more fun it must be to work when fun is encouraged in work.
Post affair, we limited the kids to one activity at a time, I opted out of reserves when my contract was up and Ann worked a job that consisted of three, twelve hour shifts. This left her with plenty of margin in her life which freed up margin for everyone. We had a chance to just be together and be silly if it happened or to plan something fun to do together, either all four of us or just the two of us.
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven…a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance. Ecc. 3:1,4 NIV
There's an opportune
time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth… A
right time to cry and another to laugh, a right time to lament and another to
cheer. Ecc. 3:1,4 MSG