Examen is an ancient practice, but I was introduced to it a few years ago by my friends Aram and Ellen Haroutunian. It is an excellent way for a couple to connect on a daily basis. I encourage you to choose this or FANOS to share your heart with your spouse daily. It will speed up your recovery through the pain if there is honest and humble conversation each day.
Here is how examen goes. You might recognize the questions from the other spiritual intimacy posts.
Experience 5 minutes of silence by yourself, then reflect on the following questions. Follow up your personal reflection time by discussing your responses with your spouse.
- What did you experience or do that caused you to be in deeper connection with God, others and yourself?
- What did you experience or do that caused you to feel disconnected from God, others and yourself?
- For what moment today am I most grateful?
- For what moment today am I least grateful?
- When did I give and receive the most love today?
- When did I give and receive the least love today?
- When did I feel most alive today?
- When did I most feel life draining out of me?
- When did I feel most connected to you?
- When did I feel least connected to you?