200/444 Healing from Infidelity: Barriers to Intimacy, Pornography
2012.03.23
A man who uses pornography long term erodes his soul until it is a thinned out barely recognizable version of the intended robust original design. Use of pornography and sexual addictions inhibit all areas of intimacy. Fortunately, no matter how long porn has been used, redemption is possible.
What is the problem with pornography?
One problem in using pornography is that the stimulus for arousal and release is outside the person and outside an intimate relationship. There is no relationship. There are only pixels on a screen or page and fantasy playing out in the brain. Once orgasm is achieved the fantasy ends, the man is still alone and he needs to go get cleaned up.
Also, there is no risk of rejection and losing one’s self. In a real relationship there is an unknown. Will I be liked? Will I be loved? Will I know the truth? These questions can only be answered with any depth over time. In pornography they are 'answered' instantly. It's an illusion from the fantasy of the man's brain. It's a very thin response that thins the soul.
My friend Michael Cusick says, "Pornography allows a man to feel like a man without requiring him to be one."
If you struggle with pornography, you will find that the very avenue to filling the hunger inside you, to be completely and freely loved for who you are, can be met only as you risk being true to God and yourself within the sexual intimacy of your relationship with your wife. Michael has a book coming out in May 2012, Surfing for God. If you struggle with porn click on the link and pre-order it now.
Check out the book description.
"Every time a man knocks on a brothel door, he is really searching for God." -- G.K. Chesterton
Could the growing struggles with pornography and fantasy really be reminding us of our heart's deepest desire, something greater and more fulfilling than sexual gratification?
According to counselor and ministry leader Michael John Cusick, the answer is a resounding "yes." Through personal examples, lively illustrations from Scripture, and twenty years of counseling experience, Michael helps readers to understand how porn struggles begin, what to do to prevent them, and most importantly, how to overcome them once compulsive behavior presents itself.
Freedom is not an easy, how-to process:
- 25% of search engine requests are for pornography - 68 million per day
- 70% of the hits on Internet sex sites occur between 9-5 on business computers
- Over 50 percent of evangelical pastors report they viewed pornography last year
- Over 70% of Christian men report viewing pornography in the last year
Surfing for God leads readers down a clear path toward understanding how porn struggles develop, how to distinguish between sexual gratification and intimacy, and how to break free from the shackles of this pleasurable prison.