147/444 Healing from Infidelity: Individual Styles of Expressing Anger
2012.01.30
I can't remember exactly where I first saw this list. We've added to it a bit and changed it a little but mostly it stands as it did in the original form. A shoutout to the author of the book where I first read it.
As we go through these keep an eye out for the two or three that best describe how you express your anger. Resolve to seek healing for what fuels your expression of anger in hurtful ways.
Direct Approaches:
The Straight Shooter - This is the best way to deal with anger. This person can describe what happened, why it is a problem, why they are angry, and what they would like done about the issue. Sometimes the style is loud, and sometimes calm and quiet. This style demonstrates assertive anger. Being assertive is stating your true desires. It includes taking a stand for personal worth, needs and convictions while also being constructive and considerate of the needs of others. In shooting straight there is a significant level of other-centeredness when expressing anger.
Crooked Shooter - Wants to be a straight shooter, but often their irritation is directed at attacking the person instead of the situation. The crooked shooter has no fear of the results of attacking in a self-centered way. This person will get over their anger more quickly because it is dealt with, but it still is a poor way of expressing anger.
Tomorrow we'll move on to indirect approaches and then explore toxic ways of expressing anger.