101/444 Healing From Infidelity: What Men Need to Understand about Women: Love me unconditionally
2011.12.15
At the core of a woman’s soul she desires love…unconditional love. I neglected to add that one word yesterday. And that one word makes a world of difference.
We desire to know that you believe in the beauty of our hearts even when we show the unlovely side of our soul or we take charge in a hard manner. As I mentioned yesterday, when we experience that unconditional love from you, it is much like the experience of unconditional love from the Father in that it releases us to be the women God created us to be.
We desire security. And as I said yesterday, our hearts feel more secure when we feel the strength of your love. We feel safe when we are assured of your love. That means no jokes about ‘trading us in for a newer model’ or throwing around the D word (d-i-v-o-r-c-e as Tammy Wynnette would sing). Because when we feel safe, we feel the freedom to explore and become who God designed us to be. Whether that is a poet or an architect, a stay at home mom or a CEO…or all of the above at one time or another!
We desire to feel cherished. And to cherish is to hold dear, to treat with affection and tenderness. It is also to adore, defend, embrace, honor, prize, treasure, delight in. Ladies, how often do you feel this in any area of your life? Men, how do you do this for your wife?
I felt cherished just a few months ago when Ben went to great lengths to extravagantly celebrate my birthday. I didn’t receive a diamond ring or a new car or a lavish gift. What I did receive was his gift of bringing my treasured friends and our daughter (all the way from Denver) for a surprise party. He planned it all and took care of the details right down to the black and gold Mizzou cake. My heart was so incredibly full. I felt treasured, adored, and loved with tenderness and abandon. I felt delighted in.
Yes, God delights in us, but your delight in us helps give us the confidence we need to risk in relationship with you and others…and yep, you guessed it…and to risk being the woman God designed us to be rather than the woman the world demands we be.