Taking a retreat can be great for a marriage. About 16 months after the revelation of the affair Ann and I went to the Lake of the Ozarks and stayed at a sweet lake home. Since it was January we mostly had the area to ourselves. It was great just to hang out, laugh, read psalms, feed each other, sing off key (I know no other way) and be goofy with one another. It was soul refreshing and a great celebration of entering resurrection following the crucifixion and tomb time post affair.
In my work with men and women dealing with infidelity I have also seen how individually attending a conference or retreat stirs the soul and instigates change in ways that are much different than a counseling office. Somehow this getting away and apart from our beloved (and at times hated) spouse creates a different space for God to speak to us.
Go to a Beth Moore Conference or a Wild at Heart Gathering or a monastery or a silent stay in a mountain cabin or whatever. Just go. Get away. Unplug. Open your mind, heart and soul to the rhythm of the spirit and he will be faithful to bring genesis to your life.
From Psalm 51
God, make a fresh start in me,
shape a Genesis week from the chaos of my life.
Don’t throw me out with the trash,
or fail to breathe holiness in me.
Bring me back from gray exile,
put a fresh wind in my sails!